Long Distance

Marie-Pierre writes:

For years, I  have been calling my parents (and when they were alive, my grand parents) for a weekly long-distance conversation every Sunday.  Now my children are doing the same, or at least attempting to.  The Sunday ritual evolved when a combination of landlines and time zones demanded that we made arrangements to call at a set time, but our iphones are keeping us far more connected and flexible.

Last week, Emilio  “face-timed” me at the office when he wanted to show me his new haircut.  He later called me from a liquor store in Ottawa for wine tips, and again from Montreal to tell me about his Canadian Thanksgiving.  Isabel might call at just about anytime during the week and I am pretty sure to find a daily Facebook status update awaiting me every morning.  Stan texts his two daughters all day long.  Kelsey was skyping him earlier this week.  Even my mom has taken to emailing me several times a week with jokes, pictures or just quick updates about what’s going on.  I am used to keeping in touch with my children, but I have truly enjoyed the frequent communication with my mom.

Long distance does not feel so long anymore.  These unexpected bursts of spontaneity have made us feel closer, more real.   As far as I am concerned, I am happy to embrace the bounty of technological change that keeps us connected no matter what.

Stan writes:

It is amazing to me sometimes when I am Skyping my daughter Kelsey that she is really half way around the world in Australia.  We text as if she is right here in town and when we talk the only weird piece is the time difference.  It is a 15 hour difference so most of my contact with her comes later at night for me and its about noon the next day there for her.

I am finally getting used to her being away because in the last 4 years she has been at college, so I am used to every other month visits.  I think it will really hit me when the vacation season comes….especially Christmas.

She is doing great and loves it in Australia.  I don’t think it is what she expected yet I get the sense she is taking advantage of her time there.  I still think there are a lot of adventures there for her.

MP talks regularly with Emilio and he is finding his way to taking care of himself in Canada also….and all reports are he is having a blast and working hard at school.  What I love and what reminds me of me when I was younger is when Emilio “sneaks” in a call to MP for cooking questions then immediately has to get off the phone…….probably because his friends are coming up and he doesn’t want them to know he is calling his Mom……I did the same thing.

All is good is here…..missing our young ones…..and knowing that they are getting exactly what they need and we are learning the long journey of supporting without fixing……with long distance being our teacher.

Back in the Saddle … Again

Stan writes:

The relationship that MP and I have with our art and music is a ebb and flow type of relationship.  Some weeks we get to do a lot of our art and music and others not.  The weeks that we do not get to do a lot of our art are usually the weeks that one or both of us are not quite our usual perky selves.

Well, the last few weeks have been MP’s turn to be missing her studio and art work.  Because of her new job, she has been pretty occupied with getting things in order and last week she went to support her daughter on her journey.  What that adds up to is time away from the studio.

This past weekend, things got evened out.  We both spent a lot of time in our respective studios and we both had a great weekend with our art and music.  By the time Saturday night rolled around, MP was beside herself because she had made some real breakthroughs with her website and getting her art displayed there.  If you are interested, MP’s website is www.mpsink.com and it is looking AWESOME.

It looks like we are back in the saddle again, where everything is clicking……happens every time when we do our art and music…..guess what we will be doing this weekend???

Marie-Pierre writes:

We spent most of last weekends in our respective studios.  We met mostly for meals although breakthroughs and bouts of despair sent us to the other’s space.

– Come and check what I’ve done to Kelsey’s voice.
– Log on to my website, I want you to see the button I made
– Listen to the violin.  Pretty awesome uh!
– Look at those colors!
– I got to step away I can’t get the drums.
– I can’t find the “advanced” option for page turning
– Do you want a cup of tea?  I can’t get that lick to expand.
– Did you eat all the cookies?  I can’t believe you ate the cookies.   I just spent an hour trying to find out how to trace that photo, now I need a cookie and you ate them all!

We did go watch The Master on Sunday night but we returned to our work immediately after that.  And then thank God it was Monday and I at least got to return to office work where the workdays are someone fixed and predictable and I got so restless thinking about when I would have time to return to the studio.

Pride

Marie-Pierre writes:

I drove to Austin last weekend to walk with Isabel in the Pride parade.  She was the organizer of the first UT alumni association participation in the parade.  It was a big deal and I thought if nobody showed up, I better be there to help my daughter, carry the other half of the banner and march with her.  As it turns out, my worries were unfounded.   About forty people showed up, most of them young. 

I think most of us were a little scared.  Marching in a parade is never for the shy and there is still plenty of prejudice against gay people; we didn’t know what to expect.

I walked right behind Isabel, who was upfront with Brian, an alumni association officer.  I was so proud of my daughter.  She led the group through the parade, singing “The eyes of Texas are upon you”.  People were applauding and singing with us and two or three joined our group and walked the rest of the way with us.   By the time we reached the end, we were walking through a gauntlet of people.  “Texas fight” was playing from atop the roof of one of the bars.  We were thrilled and a little bit shocked that we had done it and it had gone so quickly.

I felt so privileged to have to have witnessed not only this moment but how Isabel had grown to become this spectacular person.

Stan writes:

Last weekend MP went to Austin to support Isabel in her organizing UT alumni association in participating in the Pride parade.  She got a nice UT orange shirt and she was ready to go.

What I love so much about MP is her dedication to what she believes and her dedication to her children.  This event covered both subjects.  This event is also one which MP has supported Isabel from the beginning in an area of life where parental support is nowhere near it should be. 

So later Saturday the pictures started getting posted on  Facebook and I talked to her on the phone and she was really excited and most of all very proud of Isabel and her journey.

My hat is off to Isabel and all her energy to bring people together for causes that are important to her…..because she is making a difference in this world…….very, very cool.

The CD

Stan writes:

All that I have been talking about lately is my CD.  The CD that I have been working on diligently for the last  4 months.  It is coming to a finish and I am excited and ready to close this baby out.

The CD is called Flyin Blind and I will post where you can listen to it when it becomes available.  It is also the subject of my other blog this week…..Balance.  I have been somewhat out of balance ever since my sound studio was finished.  I love this stuff and right now I seem to go until I am crossed eyed.

It became a topic of conversation around balance for me and MP AND it is one of the best accomplishments I have ever had.  I am really proud of myself.

As I finish up this CD, I am already working on some new projects…..yet they will never be known as “the CD” because there is only one first…..and Flyin Blind is mine……I did it all with the awesome help of my friends and teachers…….Flyin blind.

Marie-Pierre writes:

Stan has promised me a new CD of this work.  It will be the third in as many weeks.  Each new CD is better than the last, the sound richer and more developed.  Each CD is customized to my taste.  I like the mellow songs but  I won’t listen to rap or high-energy rock-n roll.  It’s pretty cool to listen to professional music and think “that’s my sweetheart right there” playing a guitar solo or singing backup lyrics.  Several of the songs feature Stan’s daughter, Klesey, on vocals.  She has a pretty amazing voice, proof that music runs in the family.

I am not sure what the plans are for the current CD.  I would love for it to end up on the air and for a good chunk of the world to sing to Stan’s tune.  In the meantime, I am feeling pretty thrilled about being the recipient of the advance preview, even though it’s meant I have (partially) lost my boyfriend to the music studio.  Hope you all get a link to his work soon.

 

Stuck in 1st Gear

Marie-Pierre writes:

I was flustered last night.  My car was having transmissin problems; it wouldn’t engage past second gear and would lurch forward every few yards, making the most god-awful noises along the way.  I called Stan of course.  He is supposed to fly to my rescue if anything happens to me on the road.   he is supposed to jump in his car and drive wherever I am parked to fix the flat, call the tow truck and generally make things better.

I never had to test that theory until last night.  My car is almost new and in very good shape, but Stan didn’t disappoint me.  He immediately asked where I was and started to shut down his computer while running through a list of questions.  Was I in “drive” (yes), did my car act up before (sort of, I thought), was I near a parking lot (no), could I stop (no), did I renew my AAA membership (no).  I was upset and hang up mid-sentence so I could negotiate a ver slow turn and find a parking lot.  
I was sweaty and upset but decided the best course of action was to breathe, stop the car and calmly start it again to see what would happen.  

As it turned out, I had been stuck on the manual gear setting.  I had started my car in the dark parking lot at my new work and hadn’t noticed I had pushed past the “Drive” mode.  Rats!
I called Stan to let him know I was o.k.  He didn’t even make fun of me.  

It’s good to have backup.

Stan writes:

Yesterday at about 5:15 pm I got a call from MP who was somewhat panicky.  She told me that her car was not running right and she thought something was wrong with her transmission.  She was stuck in traffic and was nervous about what to do.

So I did what most men would do……I started asking questions.  “Is it making any clunking noises?”  “No, it just only goes so fast and then makes a whining sound.”  “Is it grinding or slipping?”   “No, it just seems that it won’t go very fast and as long as I go slow, it seems OK, it’s just not running right.”  “Do you have it in the right gear?  “Of course I have it in the right gear, I know how to drive my car……I just need to get off the phone and pull over and see what is up.”

OK….so I got ready to go get her and was racking my brain as to what it could be.  Usually when transmissions  go …they go.  Anyway, I was about out the door and MP called me back and said “Everything is OK……I was in the wrong gear…..I was stuck in low (or first)gear.”   I was happy that she was OK and she was embarrassed because she had been driving her car for blocks in traffic in first gear…..with the gears and engine whining away…..just like it suppose to in 1^st gear.

So we had a good laugh and started talking about the synchronicities of this and how this comes at a time of such change for her. It was one of those moments where I didn’t have to say a whole lot…..I think she knew exactly why she got stuck in low gear…….needless to say, she changed gears and she is back in business…..that’s my MP.

Empty Nesters……Again!!!

Marie – Pierre writes:

With both Kelsey and Emilio abroad and our two older daughters working in other cities, we are on to another period of calm an empty-nesting.  Our lives are punctuated by the phone calls, “face time” and Skype sessions that keep us connected to each other.  And of course there is Facebook.  How did we use to live when we couldn’t check on each other’s lives through Facebook?  What I like more are the impromptu questions:

–        Mami, I am here at the grocery store.  How do I make a creamy tomato sauce?

–        Do you think you could paint an underwater scene on my bathroom wall?

–        What’s the difference between a contractor and an employee?

–        How much Ambien to prevent jet lag?

–        Do I need the accident insurance extreme sports rider?

Gone are the days of peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches, car-pools and sleepovers.  We’ve transitioned into the role of 24-hour standby resource and emergency center.  Even that will evolve.  Kelsey and Isabel have fewer and fewer questions and more reports on how they are steering their lives toward exciting beginnings.  We are forever adapting.

Stan writes:

I thought that the first time when my daughters went away to college was the only time that the “empty nester” syndrome was going to affect me……wrong.

In the last month, MP’s son, Emilio, and my daughter, Kelsey, have both embarked upon journeys that will keep them away from home longer than either one ever has.  Emilio is off to school in Canada and will not be back until Christmas.  He has gone to Rice his college career so this is the first time he has been away from home for more than a week or two.  Kelsey is going to Australia for 6-12 months and the longest I have been away from her is a few months.

So both MP and I are going through another round of empty nesting.  Neither one lived with us, although we would see them frequently.  Now I can’t just get in my car and drive to Ft. Worth if I need some Kelsey and MP the same with Emilio.

This time it’s about both of them going to another stage in life.  Emilio is getting to do things like cooking, cleaning and laundry that he has never done before and Kelsey is flying half way across the world for with no formal structure, family or university for her to lean on…..it is her and her girl friend, Randi  that she met at TCU.

So MP and I are adjusting.  MP has had a few weeks on me and has already received some “How do you cook this”  calls and I am anxiously awaiting a call that Kelsey and Randi have landed safely in Australia.

A new chapter is being written…….more to follow.

Back to Work

Stan writes:

Well now that we have had a couple of weeks off of Doublewind, we are back in the saddle.  Life has been a little different over the last few weeks as MP has been between jobs and I am coming down the stretch on my studio engineering school and final project (not to mention building my new studio)….it has been wonderful and hectic.

MP started back to work this week and it appears that it is going really well.  I think this will be a great change for her and will present her with some different challenges as well as enable her to pursue her love of art with more relaxation and focus.

She is more relaxed now than she has been since I have known her.  Credit lots of art, a trip to Montreal with her son Emilio for a week, and repeated salt bath chamber sessions.  She is really enjoying herself and with that comes some real nice connections lately.

Interestingly, enough I am the one who is too busy and I am the one who is dealing with balance of MP, music, Stan and family.  It has been a struggle for me because lately I have taped into my passion and it is full bore.  I will balance this out and MP will stay more relaxed……both big changes from this time last year……..welcome change………and welcome all the new wonderful pieces of our lives.

Marie-Pierre writes: 

Tuesday was back to work.  After three and a half weeks of doing almost nothing, I found myself booked in back-to-back meetings for three days solid and hardly a minute for a drink of water.  Thanks God I managed to slip in a good yoga class and a great dinner with my buddy Sara.  I also seem to be unphased by the amount of information that’s been thrown at me; perhaps because I am still basking in the effects of the massage I got in Canada.  I have also been spending time in my friend Michelle’s sensory deprivation tanks, an amazing experience that’s left me mellow and completely relaxed.  
We’ll see how this new work turns out.   My goal is to keep balanced and have time to do the things I enjoy.   More next week.

Week Off Pt. 2

Stan writes:

Hello all, yes another week that we are going to have to punt on.  MP is in Canada helping get her son off to school and I am getting ready for Kelsey’s leaving for Australia and doing my Audio Class Project…so to say it’s been busy around here would be an understatement.  So we will be back on next week and until then……knockem alive.

ps…..and thanks Isabel for reading each week and letting us know when we are slacking =)….

Week Off

Stan and Marie-Pierre have taken the week off from our doublewind blog as we are being lazy and choosing to be together today to connect.  We will continue next week with our ever changing lifestyles as Marie-Pierre is taking her son to school in Canada and will be starting a new job.  I am on my way to creating music for the harmony of all…..see you next week…..peace.

Off

Marie-Pierre writes:

For once I am getting the run of the house, on a break between jobs.  I spent the weekend sleeping, watching movies and sleeping some more.  Naps, naps and more naps.  There seems to be no end to the accumulated fatigue.  I am sure I am going to work it out of my system eventually.  For now, off the treadmill is one great big mattress that I keep sinking into.

I haven’t even made it to the pool yet.  Neither have I picked up a pencil.  I am a little worried that nothing will get crossed off my long to-do list.  I am just not used to rest, even though my friends and family keep telling me that’s what I need most right now and that I’ll feel must better afterwards.
Stan, on the other hand, is bustling with activity, dashing to music practices and sound engineering classes, working late on his computer, mowing the lawn, cleaning the pool, researching equipment, talking to the internet people, the security people, the sound people, the electrical people.  I had to beg him to go have coffee with me.  I needed the caffeine to perk me up until dinner.  He drank decaf so he wouldn’t explode.  

Perhaps this is o.k.  Our opposite energies balance each other out.  For now,  one more time.  My time will come.

Stan writes:

Well MP finally pulled the trigger and quit the Greensheets.  Her time there served her well as well as she learned a lot and she has grown so much in the last 4 years.  It was probably the hardest place in some ways that she has also worked.

Now she is off and the first day was quite funny.  She did not know what to do with herself.  She was in conflict between the part of her that felt that she should be busy accomplishing her goals and the part of her that wanted to take some time off and relax.  It was like watching two people in one…..needless to say by the end of the day she was tired.

Amazingly enough, the second day was very different and she was a lot more relaxed.  She still has not figured out how to “do nothing”  ……. and that is also her talent and why she is so accomplished.

That is where I come in…..I can teach her to do nothing.  Although I have learned that when she wants to learn something she will let me know, so in the meantime I have gotten really busy with my life and neither one of us are doing nothing, so we will see.

I sure love having her around though…..this is really cool…..and I will enjoy every minute because in September there are no more Mondays off and then I will really miss having her around.